Selfie--Inside vs. Out

Selfies aren't my thing.  I don't do it much, but I'm fascinated sometimes with what I see in the mirror compared to what the camera captures in a split second.  Not even a second apart from my viewed reflection, the two are most often vastly different.  Which is truer?  My perception or the concrete image captured?  Is one right and the other wrong?

Had I not started with giving up cream of... soups, Lipton's onion soup mix, baking mixes, and Crisco two years ago, I wouldn't be where I am now.  Baby steps; it starts with teeny baby steps.  Wanting to give birth free of unnecessary intervention and exclusively breastfeed were the initial tipping point for me, really.  Had I gotten into nutrition at the same time, it's interesting to think how my experiences might have been different, my life more healthy in general.  So basically, I got "crunchy" after having a baby at home.  Odd, because to most people that seems like the pinnacle of "crunchiness."  Nope, not for me.


I may seem to blend in with skinny jeans, makeup, and smocked-clad kiddos, but I'll share a few ways to spot a hippie mama no matter what the wrapper looks like:

• There are jars of things fermenting on various surfaces and in dark, cool nooks of her home.
• There are cloudy bowls of grains, beans, nuts, and/or seeds soaking on her countertops.
• Her two year old differentiates between cow, coconut, and mama milk.
• You snoop in her bathroom and find a "medicine" cabinet full of mysterious amber bottles of varying sizes, tubes or bottles of little white pellets with funny names, bags or jars of things that appear to belong in the kitchen spice cabinet, and jars with hand-written labels.

• Her kids breastfeed baby dolls.
• She offers to let you add things to her co-op order.
• She is who you go to about weird shit that your pediatrician or family doctor blows off or cannot accurately diagnose.
• She thinks gut flora is paramount. 

• She doesn't put much on her face/skin that she would not put in her mouth.
• She uses words like birth, premature cord clamping, intact, and child-led weaning to normalize the normal, physiological order of things.
• Everything is homemade, preservative and dye-free, and maybe grain or gluten-free to boot.
• Her family sleeps in one big heap or plays musical beds often.
• Her husband asks if there is any "real" toothpaste or shampoo.
• Sweet almond oil, wheat germ oil, diatomaceous earth, brown rice flour, honey, coconut oil, emu oil, a clay or two, and various essential oils are all part of her skincare routine.
• If coconut oil, breastmilk, raw apple cider vinegar, baking soda, or bentonite clay can't fix it, she is lost.
• She calls stopping on the side of the road to pluck some medicinal plant "wildcrafting."
• When browsing her bookshelves, you quickly realize most of her library consists of books on birth, breastfeeding, attachment parenting, homeopathy and herbs, essential oils, whole foods, chickens, gardening, and "prepper" style survivalist books.
• You cannot find a can of comet or clorox wipes everywhere.
• She cooks with much demonized animal fats like lard, tallow, bacon grease, and butter.
• She makes her kids wash off hand sanitizer.
• Her husband can double as a doula or lactation adviser in a pinch.
• She hoards glass jars.

Does this sound familiar or wildly foreign?  What would you add or change? 

The spectrum of being a hippie, interchangeably holistic or healthy, mama is widely varied. Anchoring one end, you might be where I was a couple of years ago--mostly mainstream and happy with Betty Crocker cake mixes and Good Seasons Italian Dressing packets.  Holding down the other end of the spectrum, you might be far beyond my somewhat middling tendencies and grind your own grains for bread, sprout everything, and make, grow, and/or cull pretty much everything that goes onto or into your family.

Either is fantastic, and I applaud your dedication and curiosity!  Ask me questions if you want to know more.  I would love to pick your brain over a cup of tea if you are the rabbit racing ahead of me. 

The journey, and it's certainly been one, has been more like traveling the narrowing gyres of a big, loopy spiral.  On the outer edges, it seems complicated, dizzying even, to peer down into the center.  In truth, the center is a pinpoint.  Things narrow or clarify as you get closer to the center, and the whorls around you look complicated and exhaustingly long.  This spiral begins in the chaos of conventional wisdom, media fads, and cultural pressure and narrows into stability, self-sufficiency, and freedom.

Time IS on Your Side

Preparing for class is always enjoyable for me.  This morning, I've been reviewing my materials for class 2 where we focus on the early or "latent" phase of the first stage of labor.  In doing so, I've been reading up on Frieman's Labor Curve and the new ACOG recommendation to reduce primary cesareans.  It all centers around time--how long is normal, what risks are associated with waiting longer, is labor to be gauged by the amount of time mom feels contraction or her dilation?  It seems stupid to me that a massive crew of experts got together and said essentially, "If we wait until more women are actually in labor to admit them to the hospital, we will lower the primary cesarean rate."

That's progress?  That took days of meeting and presentations?  Admitting women to the hospital just because they are contracting is silly, but it's what most often happens.  I cannot tell you how many times I've been told or read things like, "At my appointment, I was having a lot of contractions.  You could see them on the monitor, but I didn't feel them.  The doctor told me to go on over to the hospital!"  There are so many things wrong there.  I'm not quite sure where to start.

If you cannot feel contractions, they don't count.  Just because you are contracting, does not mean you are progressing much less in actual labor.  This is NOT evidence-based care.  This kind of care increases risks to you and your baby despite the false sense of control a scheduled birth may give you.

Hospitals must stop being afraid to send mothers home to wait.  They must also stop offering social or convenience births.  They must also stop rupturing membranes as an initial step in the induction process so a mom can go home and try another day if things just are not progressing.  Very rarely do the risks of staying pregnant another day or two outweigh the risks of having an emergency birth, cesarean or vaginal, for you or for baby.  Forcing an induction when your body just isn't ready increases risk of forceps and vacuum, episiotomies 3rd and 4th degree tears, and finally a cesarean birth.  All of those same risks still apply when you are admitted in early, early labor and the cascade of augmentation begins.  I often wonder how many people were actually induced when they think they were augmented.

Another favorite of mine is, "Well, I'd been having contractions for a while, so we decided to go on in."  Could you walk?  Talk?  Were you still laughing, putting on makeup, maybe fixing your hair between them?  You can have episodes of contractions for weeks before labor starts.  Many women experience prodromal labor almost every night for the last week or two of pregnancy.  It's normal.  It's not pathological--"I just can't seem to go into labor."  No, instead of that try shifting your thinking to: "My body is getting ready."  Even if there is no cervical change, those contractions may be helping to position your baby.  They give you a chance to practice coping with contractions.  Your best bet is to wait and rest up as much as possible.  Go about your life until they demand all of your focus and energy.

Care providers must be more patient prior to labor and "allow" a woman's body to start labor on it's own.  Most women will begin spontaneous labor between 38 and 42 weeks gestation not 38-40 weeks.  A huge proportion of cesareans would not happen if doctors customized care and waited to intervene at 42 completed weeks as suggested in Williams Obstetrics.  Of course, that is not always appropriate, but it's up to each care provider to customize care to fit that situation.  It's abundantly clear that one-size-fits-all maternity care isn't working out so well.

Mothers have to be better prepared to wait and recognize true labor.  Yes, you need more information and support than what your doctor provides.  Yes, it's hard to wait.  Yes, you are big, maybe uncomfortable, tired, whatever.  I've been almost 42 weeks pregnant in August.   I knew what the signs of real labor were, and waited out a day of contractions at 34 weeks most likely caused by dehydration and doing too much.

I've been with a mom having contractions 3 minutes apart at 38 weeks.  We went to the hospital.  She was about 5 centimeters dilated.  The contractions stopped...for hours...maybe forever.  The nurse gave her the choice--you can stay and the attending doc will want to start piton or you can go home and wait.  She went home to wait.  The baby came 10 days later.  She had the confidence in her body and the information to step back and realize that contractions do not always a birth day make.

I have another friend who just had her baby at 42+3 with the support of a wonderful doctor.  It is your choice.  It's your provider's job to be honest about what choices are safe and be respectful of your wishes.

There is so much more to early labor, hence we spend a whole 3 hour class focusing on it, but here is the bottom line: it's your choice--your choice to pick a provider who will offer you individualized, evidence-based care; your choice to prepare yourself with information, tools for labor, and patience;   your choice to do your best to have a healthy pregnancy; your choice where, when, and how your baby is born.

Haitches

The Rain in Spain reduces me to giggles still.  Children have made it even funnier.  Their mispronunciations and grammatical faux pas butcher the English language as much as Audrey Hepburn's put-on Cockney.  True Cockney is as unintelligible as the Cajun coach on Waterboy, just pray you catch a few key words and are an apt student of body language.  It's your only hope.

Eliza's "haitches" are particularly hopeless and horrendous.  I love the etymological roots of our letter "H."  Is it a vowel or a consonant?  Haitch or aitch?  I'll refrain from indulging myself in a grown-up Sesame Street sing along for today's letter of the day, though it might be fun.  Is it an English major thing?  A book worm thing?  I get on a letter and brainstorm all of the words I like that begin with it.  Much like after reading Shakespeare, I have to check myself to keep from speaking in iambic pentameter.  Unless you need good wording for a child's birthday party, that shit's just annoying.  The patterns or words fascinate me--the rises and falls, the harmony and dissonance.

As I start working on revising my blog's look and purpose, I thought about why I named it Mississippi Hippie Mama.   Am I really a hippie?  What on earth is a Mississippi hippie?  Why even keep Mississippi in the title?  I haven't lived there in almost ten years.

Mississippi is in me.  You can't beat it out of me.  It's not going to gradually wear away with time.  It's just there.  It's a poor and proud little state.  It gets torn down by natural disasters and it's own internal turmoil and politics, but it hops right back up.  It's a brave and giving state.  It's got the best music in the world, the best food, the best people.  Have you ever thought of all of the talent that comes out of Mississippi--the musicians, the writers, the actors, the artists?

Mississippi stays.  Faulkner nailed it when he said, "To understand the world, you must first understand a place like Mississippi."  I cannot define myself or tell my story without Mississippi in all it's complexity.

I probably would have enjoyed some of the philosophies, people, and parties of San Francisco's Haight-Ashbury in the 60's, but I would have enjoyed the new Pucci boutique on the designer row as well.  That's a big part of why I say Mississippi hippie.  Every place we have lived, people ask where I'm originally from.  "Oh, you're a Jackson girl," they say like that explains it all.  What on earth?  Are we that distinct?  I don't wear heels and makeup every single day anymore. Does the Jackson cultural equivalent of Eliza's diphthong deficiency still linger?  Apparently so.

Yes, I like yoga, wear busted Birkenstocks, diffuse essential oils, ferment things on my granite countertops, breastfeed indefinitely, embrace informed decision making, forgo sunscreen for that vitamin D, sew clothes for my kids, hoard mason jars, have babies at home, use coconut oil for everything (yes, everything), cosleep, think GMOs are the great satan, and idealize "intentional living communities."  I also love red lipstick, designer denim, a good party, the internet, setting a pretty table, vampire novels, beer, Clorox, Miss Manners, angry rock and roll for running, interior design, monogrammed stationery, finger sandwiches, and codeine cough syrup when all else fails.

It's like wearing amber with pearls or a diamond drop, both of which I've done.  I'm not picking.  The H stays.  In fact, I don't love the word hippie.  It's kind of silly, maybe even a pejorative depending on who drops it as a word bomb.  Lots of other H's fit:

Healthy, holistic, happy, helpful, homemade, happy-go-lucky, honest, hausfrau, and harmony-craving.

I am also harsh, half-cocked, hurried, hormonal, hard-headed, hasty, and maybe a dash heretical.

Most of all I'm human.  If you can't find a seemingly irreconcilable difference within your predilections or preachings, dig a little deeper.   You are one of two things--a liar or a bore.  There is no neat, simple solution.  I'm both, two things diametrically opposed--southern traditionalist and non-conforming free-spirit.  Instead of, "If you can't say anything nice, come sit by me," my motto should be, "If you can't quite fit in, come sit by me."  I usually find a way to blend the overlapping edges just like a good eyeshadow application, shifting between circles like the outfit that can go from day to night out with a change of shoes.

Don't cram yourself into one teeny, limiting box.  That's just no fun.  Be complicated, be controversial, be genuine.

Beer and Emergency Birth

Those two things do not fit together.  I can see it, too.  I'm southern.  I chit chat.  People tell me things.  Odd topics get related.  We talk about who our people are.  We make connections.  It's like a game.

Abita Mardi Gras beer--does it get much better?  Well, if you get to talk to an EMT about catching babies because of it, yes.

Here's how it happened--I'm at the grocery store checking out.  The cashier is ringing up my beer, so we naturally start talking about beer.  We both agree that we really enjoy a nice flavor.  She likes an apple beer and Southern Pecan, so I tell her that Lazy Magnolia Brewery's other good one is Indian Summer.

We both agree that plain old beer now tastes like pee.

"Oh," I say, "Excuse me, that was vulgar." 

"I'm an EMT.  That's nothing," she says with a smile.

I tell her I'm a doula so pee and bodily functions in general don't phase me.  I've blotted bubbles of meconium (this is normal with breech babies as they get squeezed down like a tube to toothpaste) off a breech baby's bum as she was being born and wiped a pushing mama before.  It's just not a big deal.

"That's one thing I haven't had to do yet--deliver a baby."

Hmmm, me either, but opportunity is calling my name.  I tell her that precipitous births are usually pretty safe and healthy.  All you really need to do is catch.  She says that's what she's been told.

The one thing in EMT births that always bothers me is how the cord is handled.  I've heard 2nd hand and from EMTs that telling parents to tie off the cord with a shoelace is still in the script.  Yikes!  Why not whip off that shoelace and flush it in a dirty toilet a few times.  It might clean it up a bit.  I cannot think of many things that get nastier than and old shoelace.

So, I smile and say that other than catching, put baby right onto mom's bare chest and leave that cord alone (that might have come out more as a threat).  It's still giving baby oxygen as long as it's pulsing.  She is interested.  She didn't know that.

The main myth I aim to dispell about cord clamping is backflow--the blood being transferred from placenta to baby will not backflow!  It is being pumped, so it is pressurized.  Now, gravity can affect how much is pumped in or out, but immediately clamping for fear of the blood draining out of baby is absurd.  The actual reason we clamp immediately comes from the days of twilight sleep and general anesthesia--the drugs used to knock mom out were so dangerous to baby that getting baby away from the influence asap was critical.  What else does that tell us?  That pain medications given to mom quickly cross the placenta and affect baby?  Yes indeed.  This same reason is why narotics like stadol, nubain, and fentanyl are not used near the time of birth.  They are known to negatively affect baby's breathing.

I quickly tell her that blood backflowing is a complete myth and that there is a substance called Wharton's jelly that beings to naturally stop the flow within the cord usually about five minutes after birth.  I reminded her that unless you have a NICU handy, it's not a good plan to cut off baby's source of oxygen.  It creates a problem where there was none and buys you time to get to safety.

All of this transpired in about 3 minutes.  It was kind of neat.  I might find a baby-friendly set of emergency birth instructions to pass her the next time I'm shopping.  I should probably keep a set* in my doula bag.  The workbook we use in class has a page for emergency birth.  It doesn't happen all that often, and I would never ever use them to replace an actual birth attendant (midwife or doctor).  I am in no way, shape, or form qualified to catch a baby.  I would in an emergency if I had to, but I would not encourage an intentional "oops-we-didn't-make-it-to-the-hospital."  It's all about using evidence-based practices.  They improve safety and outcomes no matter where you are.


The first of 3 grand rounds videos:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W3RywNup2CM
http://summaries.cochrane.org/CD004074/effect-of-timing-of-umbilical-cord-clamping-of-term-infants-on-mother-and-baby-outcomeshttp://www.midwiferytoday.com/articles/neonatalresus.asp
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W3RywNup2CM&feature=kp
http://www.mothersofchange.com/2012/01/whartons-jelly-miracle-tissue.html

*It was frustrating to see this ACNM PDF referenced all over the place and not easy to access in full form.  Do not use in place of a care provider, but in the event of a precipitous birth or other emergency, it's a good one.

This Week's Meals

I've just gotten home from the grocery store.  There is only one thing that sends me to the store at 3:30 on a weekday afternoon.  Coffee!  I'm cutting back and maybe forgoing it for Lent.  Hey, it's my only addiction, so at 31 I think I'm doing pretty well.

The mess in my kitchen does not look like progress or planning, but it is both.  Between food and artwork, the counters are covered.  I have chicken stock in the crock pot.  It's been on low for going on 24 hours.  The next step is to remove the chicken, de-bone (and talk Frank into cracking said bones open before tossing them back in the pot), put the bones back in and let it hang out until tomorrow morning.  Bone broth--even better than plain old broth.  Whole organic chickens were my splurge at the grocery store this week.  I got two.  Somehow it makes me feel better about eating meat if it was humanely raised and slaughtered.  That's another post--Kate the would-be ethical vegan.  I'll make broth, freeze it in ice-cube trays to use for other recipes, and save the picked meat for other things.  Three cheers for me--I found some big girl panties and put that baggie of organ meats into the crock pot, too.  We should all eat more organ meat, but I just cannot bring myself to do it. 

Also on the counter is some flour soaking in buttermilk for breakfast tomorrow morning.  Pancakes are always a hit, and these from Nourishing Traditions are chewier and thicker.  Dense but flavorful and filling.  For breakfast, we often have soaked oats, preferably steel cut, or these pancakes topped with cultured butter and local honey.  My favorite breakfast is Fage Total topped with my soaked oat granola and a superfood breakfast mix--cacao nibs, goji berries, and chia seeds.  I get all three of those bulk for much better prices from that Frontier co-op I love.  Of course, there is always fruit and/or eggs to round out the most important meal of the day.

This week has been a blur between a run to the Commissary on Monday, contractors working on sealing up a couple of doors in the house, and keeping up with the kids.  We've also had another big weather change that had them looking run down yesterday.  I've been giving them my elderberry glycerite (again, bulk elderberries from Frontier), 10 drops of echinacea/goldenseal tincture, and local honey mixed with warm water 3x daily.  Doubled up on our usual 1/2 teaspoon of Nordic Naturals fish oil, too.  Fingers crossed some good herbs and whole foods keep them healthy!

I meant to share our meal plans for the week on Monday or Tuesday.  In fact, the description of my kitchen and grocery run above is from late yesterday afternoon.  Here's my plan that developed Saturday or Sunday in my head and has just now made it out into print:

Stir fry--head of cabbage, veggies that needed to get used up, and organice grass-fed steak chopped into little pieces, and some seasoning.  Easy.  No recipe.  Lots of garlic and ginger.  Some coconut amnios and rice wine vinegar.  Turned out delicious.

Baked black beans with guacamole and fried plantains.  Turned out delicious except the plantains were a little under ripe.  The produce guy told me that they used to stock them brown and ripe, but nobody bought them.  I have to buy them yellow and wait....

Sweet potato veggie cakes (again, from Nourishing Traditions.).  The veggies are shredded not pureed.  Some sort of salad with the romaine I got on sale.

Paleo chicken tenders, steamed broccoli, and baked fries (with large amounts of ketchup for all but Frank) or pot roast with the same veggies.  It depends on what I pull out of the freezer.  I got organic chicken breasts and chuck roasts on special a few weeks ago. 

What's on your menu?

Cultured Kids

As in probiotics, active cultures, microorganisms that are beneficial to our guts not art museums, violin lessons, and cotillion.  I am not a scientist or a nutritionist, but I get the whole gut flora thing.  I don't always do things 100% right to keep ours healthy, but I understand why it's important.  If the little bugs that live inside you and keep things inside happy are not happy, that's no good.

There also exists a school of thought which says that generations of damaged/improperly balanced guts leaves us with an inheritance of weakened immune systems, allergies, infertility, and overall less health and well-being than those who ate optimally and did not have the environmental toxins we are daily exposed to no matter how "clean" we try and live.  The Weston A. Price Foundation has plenty of information about this.  Suffice it to say that if you know better about your gut, you should aim to do better.  Science is showing is that a healthy gut is more important that we might assume.

My first experience using a probiotic powder was when Isabelle was about nine months old.  She had a urinary tract infection.  It was asymptomatic until it was really bad.  With an infant who nurses on demand, eats some "real" food, and sips a little water from a cup, normal grumpiness from teething is hard to distinguish from other discomforts.  She had to have a very strong antibiotic, so I ventured into Whole Foods for the first time utterly lost and purchased an infant probiotic powder.  Even though the pediatrician didn't have anything very positive to say about probiotics other than, "It can't hurt," I needed to try it and know that I was doing everything (that I knew at the time) to help her get better.  It made sense to me she needed help rebuilding her good gut flora since antibiotics are broad-spectrum and kill the harmful and beneficial things in your system.  We used it.  It was fine.  It was not mind-blowing.

Fast forward one year almost to the day.  Again, we are at Whole Foods.  I am about 35 weeks pregnant and in search of the items on my list to kill Group B strep.  Isabelle's birth was completely hijacked by GBS and the antibiotics I thought I needed.  That's a whole other story.  I guess I'll share it soon, too, since Will's birth story has been floating around for a while now.

I had the same list of supplements/homeopathic remedies when I was pregnant with her, but I didn't have the scoop on GBS.  What you don't know can a) hurt you and b) dramatically affect your birth plan c) wipe out your baby's gut flora in utero if you have as much intravenous antibiotics in labor as I did.  I got everything on my list, took it twice daily until he was born, swabbed myself for GBS (my awesome midwives offered but said that given the choice, most women your rather do it themselves)at 38 weeks, and tested negative.  I'm beginning to be a little amazed.

Between then and now, we have used several different brands--some capsules, some powder, some even for the animals.  I think eating Activia is a complete joke.  When I buy a probiotic supplement, I want to know how many billion (yes, BILLION) active cells it contains.  Between all of the sugar and over-pasteurized nutritionally devoid dairy, yogurt doesn't offer much.  I'm not saying it doesn't taste good, but I'd rather have ice cream for the sugar (or aspartame which is far, far worse).  Sidenote--when you eat yogurt, please, please eat real whole-fat yogurt and put fruit and honey into it.  It's part of the "eat real food" plan.

I do think that probiotic powders have their place and are great for boosting your immune system when sick, traveling, run down, for infants and children, etc....  Not very long ago, I had a lightbulb moment.  Stupid,  really, but if the obviously lab-created powders are good for you, wouldn't foods that naturally contain various strains of live cultures be even better?  Just like how you can take a whole-foods based multi-vitamin but ideally we all get the needed nutrients from food and ditch the vitamins?

All of the "cultured" things in my fridge at the moment.  The cultures and fats in the butter and creme are delicate, so we use them as toppers since heat damages them.  Same for buttermilk and yogurt--I don't kid myself that cooking with them is the same as having them straight from the fridge.

Part of the reason I'm willing to try incorporate more cultured foods into our everyday eating is that my kids have opposite problems with the same end--one goes too much and too loose, one goes too seldom and it just doesn't smell right.  Yuck, I know.  Once you have kids, you'll be amazed how much you end up talking about poop.  It doesn't gross me out anymore--exploding diapers, catbox, doula work, whatever.  It's just poop.  With my kids, I honestly think of it as an indicator of how well I'm doing for them nutritionally.  There is actually a right and wrong look and smell for elimination.

Maybe I inherited crappy gut flora and passed it on, but I have that knowledge and some tools to help remedy the issue.  So, I started giving them kombucha, a nutritionally loaded fermented drink.  They also get plenty of that whole-fat plain greek yogurt.  I picked up some creme fraiche, cultured butter, and naturally lacto-fermented pickles.  I didn't set my cap on them eating the sauerkraut I struggle to choke down--"It's good for me.  It's good for me.  It's good for me," is my mantra as it goes down.

It helps.  Noticeably so.  I am impressed.  I like what what I'm seeing says.  One goes more often and it doesn't smell like stale airplane bathroom.  The other doesn't run from the table to the potty to have pine cone squiggle (you know the little brown things full of pollen that fall from the trees?) upset stomach.  Hallelujah!  I could easily digress into a Gargantua and Pantagruel style scatalogical moment, but I'll refrain.

Now, I'm not yet hardcore enough to try fermenting my own veggies or brewing kombucha yet.  I've looked into a SCOBY and read up on how to maintain a "mother."  The part about the mushroom blooming in Nourishing Traditions did me in.  I'm afraid I'll be added to a wierdo granola watchlist if I google "mother mushroom bloom where to buy."  I might be on one already.  I'm a bit seditious.  My grocery budget cannot sustain me buying it in quite the quantities I'd like, so maybe I'll get up some nerve and ask around for an extra SCOBY...and pretend I don't know that it's a 'shroom.

Fermented foods and foods with live cultures are important to maintaining wellness.  Not preventing illness or getting healthy.  Maintaining wellness or health and curing or avoiding disease are two very different paradigms.  Compared to even our grandparents (for my generation), our immune systems have to work even harder to keep us healthy. We of course have wider access to medical care when it's appropriate, and that does provide some counterbalance.  Honestly, though, so many of us are so dependent on medicine to patch us through, and I think that's our bodies crying for help.  Maybe just nutrition.

Most of us do not eat locally enough, grow/raise enough or our own food, or consume raw dairy products.  That's part confession on my part.  We could do better in those areas.  We don't "put up" vegetables as relishes or pickles to ferment.  A large percentage of what we eat does not come from near enough to our everyday paths to be considered part of our microbiome--ie their microorganisms are part of our body's flora.  It's really interesting to think that with the technological advances that came from people moving from their family farms into the city and suburbs we lost a lot of nutritional wisdom.  That loss is really catching up with us.

I'm glad to know about these building blocks of health if you will, these supplements that make up for our lacking diets, lacking knowledge, and GMO foods whose purported nutrients are not really bioavailable.  I'm glad to know that I can run to the store and buy a probiotic, some good fish oil or D3 when the days shorten, and beef that I didn't have to do in myself.  I'm also glad to be learning more about how to get what we need from incorporating more cultured and fermented foods into our daily routine.

I've been thinking about this for a while, and amidst my culture increasing this little gem appeared in my inbox.  I subscribe to her blog and am always drawn into her writing.  I've read several other places about gut flora related to birth, breastfeeding, babies going long periods without a bowel movement.  It's all fascinating and admittedly over my head.

We mothers have the power to reverse if not prevent this in our children.  How empowering and terrifying.  The Nourishing Traditions Book of Baby and Child Care puts it into layman's terms and even lays out an ideal way of eating preconception and prenatally to put vitamin and mineral stores and gut flora into their best working order.  I do feel overwhelmed by this.  On the other hand, looking at the sicknesses that hopefully will pass them over and the vastly improved cognitive function healthier guts can give them, how can I not try and do better for them?

Monday, Monday

Ba-da, ba-da-da-da.... How about just another manic Monday?  There are lots of song lyrics about Mondays.  We all know why.  Yesterday was a very Monday Monday.  Despite that, I finished up several things and have a precious float almost ready for tomorrow's Mini Gras parade. Such a Monday was it that I here I sit on Tuesday typing what I wanted to post yesterday.

One of my goals for the week was to be better prepared.  For me that means planning ahead for school days, having laundry done and put away, having a semi-clean and neat house, and having a list of several meals to put on the table for dinner.

Meal planning is not my favorite thing nor is scrambling at 4 when we are all hungry and tired.  Previously, I'd make my list of meals, check the pantry, make a grocery list to make up for lacking ingredients, then go shopping.  It often involved multiple stores in Mississippi to find the things I needed and wanted.  Here in Mobile, I can go in Publix and get everything, even natural-minded medicinal items and teas.  I also track the weekly and monthly sales fliers at Fresh Market.  They really have some good deals several times a month if you watch.

For shopping, I make a simple list of everyday needs then go see what produce and/or meat is on sale.  I get the ingredients then make my meal list.  It ends up being about the same cost if not less expensive and works because we keep it simple.  I just don't have time for 12 ingredient stir fry sauces.  Not that more complicated cooking isn't delicious, but I don't enjoy the prepwork and subsequent cleanup on a typical weekday.  For example, this week I only bought one package of chicken thighs and plan on using things from the freezer for other meals. 

When I say simple, I mean it.  Veggies are roasted, steamed, and maybe topped with cultured butter or coconut oil and sea salt.  Meats are baked, braised, sauteed, or slow-cooked in a dutch oven.  I've gotten better with the actual slow-cooker, but I still find the taste better and the meat more tender when cooked in the enameled cast iron dutch ovens.  Every 1-3 weeks, I make hummus from soaked garbanzo beans, granola from soaked oats, a big jar of balsamic dressing, Frank makes bread, and I cook up a big pot of quinoa.  I make huge batches of kidney, black, and garbanzo beans and freeze what we won't use immediately.  I have a very simple repertoire of recipes.  I don't get terribly creative or obsess over it anymore.   

We are not 100% grain free anymore.  What grains and beans we do are usually (ideally) soaked before eating.  Nuts, too.  To keep costs down since I am more and more committed to buying organic and/or verified non-GMO when possible, I buy grains and beans bulk at Publix.  It's SO much less expensive than cans of beans and boxes of oatmeal and quinoa.  I'd even wager that the pricing is on par with the Commissary (military base grocery store) pricing.  Organic nuts are not in my budget, so I get big bags at Sam's club.  You can't beat the price, and I do feel like the soaking and oven-drying process helps get some of the ick out.  I would rather eat well and not take vacations than save for a vacation by eating junk.  Studies like this one just published by Harvard are constant reminders that what we put inside ourselves, more importantly our children, is of critical importance.

Some other things I try and keep on hand ready to eat are avocados, apples, carrots, celery, oranges, bananas, boiled eggs, pickles, cherry tomatoes, cucumber, whole-fat plain greek yogurt, kombucha, organic somewhat local milk, coconut or almond milk, nitrite/nitrate-free bacon (I buy extra when it's on sale), and Applegate sandwich meat (again I buy up when there is a sale and freeze it for Will).  In the freezer for back-up is organic ground meat, Applegate nuggets (come on, every now and then), grass-fed hotdogs, Rudi's tortillas, a couple of Amy's pizzas, and any cuts of meat I find on special.  My pantry staples are a variety of organic canned tomatoes, canned organic green beans, canned pumpkin, a variety of flours, oats both rolled and steel cut, balsamic vinegar, honey, coconut oil, a box of O's just in case, some arrowroot cookies or ginger snaps, and a variety of "crispy" (soaked and baked dry on low heat) nuts.  We don't use up every single thing ever in a month, and the produce is part of my weekly grocery trip.

There's an old saying (and a book) about eating to live not living to eat.  Simple semantics, right?  Well, eating to live can easily turn into living to eat when you are doing your very best to learn about, find, go get, and prepare nutritious meals for your family.  I keep a running list of the biggies we need from the Commissary and Sam's.  I make weekly lists of perishables and everyday items.  All of the planning, getting, and making gets obsessive very easily.  It is important to me, but so are other things in life.  I don't want to be as consumed with food as Pinterest gets me.  Keeping a well-stocked pantry and some things in the freezer helps me not live to eat.  So do simple menus based on what I can find and what my kids will eat like this:

Sunday--Garam masala meatballs, quinoa, and roasted veggies (Maybe recipe coming later for this one.  It is really easy and fast)
Monday--Beet pancakes and fresh berries
Tuesday--Braised pork (based on this with only salt and pepper to season then topped with a jar of chutney in the last hour of cooking), steamed green beans (they were on special last week), and baby sweet potatoes.
Wednesday--leftovers
Thursday--Slow cooker chicken curry with veggies and quinoa
Friday--pizza or leftovers

That's it!  Nothing fancy.  Not a million pots, pans, and prep bowls dirty and priorities somewhat well aligned. 

Banana Oatmeal

This is short and sweet.  So much so that it's almost embarrassing to write down as an actual recipe.  Truth be told, it's a go-to for me.  Both kids LOVE it, like yell, "Yay!  Oatmeal!" after asking, "What's for dinner?"  It's just this kind of no-brainer meal that is sanity-saving for me after a long day when I have not planned well and have two exhausted children who need to be in bed asap.  This filling oatmeal is definitely on the wear them out, fill the up, and put them down plan.

 We love steel cut oats.  They are slightly chewy and almost nutty in flavor.  They are also closer to the actual plant than rolled oats, so they are less processed.  Maybe it's my Scottish heritage that makes them a comfort food not the good-for-me factor.

Soaking them makes them more easily digested and their nutrients more bioavailable.  If you are new to soaking (I've not yet graduated to sprouting), here is a quick primer: The whole idea of soaking grains (and nuts, seeds, and beans) is to trick the plant.  The plant is naturally coats its seed with a substance meant to keep it germinating until an animal has eaten it, digested it, and deposited it elsewhere.  It's a very easy and smart way for a plant to spread itself as widely as possible before sprouting a new generation.  Dandelions rely on wind to carry their seeds far and near.  Other plants rely on roaming animals pooping far away. 

On that note, here's the recipe if you still feel like eating:

1 1/2 cup steel cut oats
1 ripe banana
Sea salt
Cultured butter
Cinnamon

Soak the oats perferably overnight or at least 6 hours.  Mine were only soaked for about an hour and did take longer to cook, about 20 minutes.  After soaking, place in a fine strainer and rinse.  Put into a large pot and barley cover with water, about 1/4 above the oats if you barely soaked like me, less if you soaked.

Soaking oats

My very scientific way of measuring

Cook over high heat until boiling, stirring frequently.  Once you get a good rolling boil, reduce heat to low to medium low.  Stir constantly, and cook until thick.  When you scrape your spoon across the bottom of the pan, it should make a line that the oatmeal slowly slides back into.

A rolling boil

Consistency check

Turn the heat off and let cool slightly in the pot.

Chop your banana and divide between two bowls.  Mash with a fork.

Add oatmeal, stir, and top with cultured butter, a few dashed of cinnamon, and maybe some honey.  Honey will make oatmeal soupy, so go easy on it.

Let it sit a few more minutes to cool, let the kids eat, and hope your bowls look like this in a few minutes.

The dinner table was all but silent tonight

Simple Tomato Sauce

Oops!  Forgot to put the garlic in the shot. 

There are so many different ways to concoct this based on what I have on hand that it's challenging to write down.  It's the first thing that turned out delicious consistently with no outside recipe in hand.  It's the dumbed down friend of my all time favorite red sauce recipe--Marcella Hazan's Ragu alla Bolognese.  I believe the proscuitto and cream laden original recipe is from one of her renowned cookbooks.  Mine is a photocopy about 5"x3" that may or may not have come with the food processor my parents got when I was a baby.  Still works just fine.

Maybe you do, but I don't usually have prosciutto, heavy cream, or the time and energy to spend on the food processor.  If your family (or picky kid) prefers smoother sauce, feel free to use the food processor.  Have fun washing it afterwards.  This adaptation is an easy everyday meal.  My pickier kid slurps it up with the chunks of veggies.  He is actually why I started making it instead of falling back on a jar of premade here and there.  He will not touch jarred sauce, even organic and/or reduced sodium, not even for the fun of noodles.  There are some other things he refuses to eat that are extremely processed, kind of like the canary in a mine.  Of course, he'll knock you down for goldfish, marshmallows, and dye-loaded frosting.  

It's also dinner for tomorrow.  We have a busy day that will last well into the afternoon.  I'm not usually one to plan ahead that well, but I had the time and ingredients today.  It also gets better as it sits.  Just leave it in the pot, let it cool, refrigerate, and pull out to reheat in the original pot. 

Are you noticing a theme here?  Minimizing dish washing!

4 carrots peeled and finely chopped
3 stalks celery finely chopped
1 large or 2 regular onions finely chopped
5-8 garlic cloves (We go through a lot of garlic) smashed then minced or peeled and grated on a microplane.

Lots of veggies, but they cook down well.

Smashed, skins still on.

1/3-1/2 cup wine (red or white will do, though the original recipe calls for white), or 1/2 cup any stock (preferably homemade) + 3 Tbsp balsamic vinegar

1 lb. ground meat--turkey, beef, venison, chicken, some blend of any of these with sausage shucked from casings)
1-28 oz can crushed tomatoes (I have not gone so far as to put up my own tomatoes, but a food mill is on my ultimate kitchen tools list)
1 14.5 oz can diced tomatoes (we love fire-roasted)
1 6 oz can tomato paste (just in case your sauce doesn't thicken and you like a more stew-like sauce)

Italian seasoning
Nutmeg
Salt & pepper
Olive oil (or bacon grease, ghee, or tallow if you are all into the paleo thing and worried about rancid oils from heat)
Butter

In a large pot (perferably an enameled cast iron dutch oven) heat 2 Tbsp olive oil and 2 Tbsp butter over medium high heat.  Once the foam on the butter subsides, add the carrots, celery, onion, and ground meat.  Cook, stirring frequently until veggies are tender and meat is almost cooked through.  This is easiest to tell with beef or venison.  Toss garlic with salt & pepper plus 3-4 dashes of nutmeg on top and give it a quick turn around the pot, maybe 1 minute of constant stirring as garlic burns easily.

Like that hunk 'o turkey?

Excuse my poor exposure here.  Still getting to know the new camera and took these in a hurry.

Add wine and turn heat to high.  Stir constantly until liquid is evaporated almost completely.

It was seriously purple when I first poured in the wine!

When there is little to no liquid, add crushed and diced tomatoes plus a palm full or heaping tablespoon of Italian seasoning.  Bring to a boil, reduce heat to medium low or low, cover and cook for about 30 minutes.  Maybe stir 2-3 times and replace the lid. 

Again, operator error with the camera.  You get the idea.

Cook uncovered for 15-30 minutes more until slightly reduced and deep red in color.  Add water if it looks too thick for your liking or that can of tomato paste if it looks to thin.  Adjust seasoning if needed.  You could always leave out the dried herbs and add some fresh basil on top before serving.  Sadly, my basil is defunct.

Thick with all the flavors well "married" and ready to eat.

Soaked Bean Chili

It's that time of day when I'm either prepping what I can of the pre-planned dinner or scrambling to thaw what I've decided to throw together.  This means I have to have a fairly decent stock of basic items.  Tonight we are having Paleo Almond Chicken Tenders (if my chicken breasts thaw in time), baked sweet potatoes, and something green that has yet to be decided.  They are delicious, require a few ingredients, and both kids like them.  This is somewhat miraculous.

Spaghetti is my other last-minute fallback.  Will eats spaghetti like he has not eaten for days.  He is my pickier kid.  He eats lots of things, but not lots of dinner-type things if that makes sense.  Soup and casseroles are two of the biggies on his "no" list.  This makes dinner challenging.  Isabelle will wolf down just about anything.

I couple of weeks ago, I decided to try chili on top of spaghetti noodles.  I'm not the first to make Mexican spaghetti.  He always loves to help cook, so we made it together, and he ate it!  I think he may have even enjoyed it!

The basic ingredients and cooking techniques for chili are just like that of spaghetti--one big pot, meat, onion, bell pepper, tomato--the spices and add-ins are where it gets different.  Onion, bell pepper, various canned tomatoes, frozen veggies, and frozen meat are all basics for me.  I can find all organic, the cans are BPA-free, and I can send Frank on a big trip to the commissary monthly to keep my pantry and freezer stocked without opening a vein at Publix.  I can also order any organic spice that I need from the awesome Frontier co-op that a friend runs.  Avoiding GMOs, eating organic foods, and eating fresh foods when and where you can and can afford does truly make a difference in your overall health.

One thumbs up

Another thumbs up

I hope your kid's plate will look like this

1. 1 pound grass-fed ground beef (optional: 1-1/2 pound of your favorite sausage, casings removed.  I had chorizo from Fresh Market.)
2. 1 green bell pepper, finely chopped
3. 1 large onion, finely chopped
4. 3-5 (or more for me!) cloves of garlic, grated on a microplane or smashed then minced
5. 1 can of crushed tomatoes
6. 1 can of tomato sauce 
7. 1 can tomato paste
8.  1 large sweet potato, peeled and cut into about 1 inch chunks
9. 2 cups soaked, precooked kidney beans (soak for 12-24 hours and cook.  This makes the beans no big deal on your tummy and increases nutrient absorption)
10. 1 10-oz package frozen corn (one can drained or 1 1/2c fresh may be substituted) 
11. 1 tsp salt
12. 2 tsp cumin
13. 2 tsp chili powder

In a large pot or dutch oven (you cannot beat enameled cast iron!), cook ingredients 1-3 over medium heat for 5-8 minutes until the meat is no longer pink and the veggies are tender.  Do NOT drain off the liquid.  This is both good for you and flavorful.  If it's organic and grass-fed, I do not waste a drop!

Add the garlic, ingredients 11-13, and give a quick stir.  Garlic burns easily, so have your tomatoes open and ready to pour in as soon as you give the garlic and spices a turn around the pot.

Add ingredients 5-7 to the pot ans stir until well combined.  Bring to a boil.  Reduce heat to low so that bubbles still break occasionally.  This is a simmer.

Add ingredients 8-10 and stir gently.  This is why you needed to use a big pot.  Cover and forget about it for about 30 minutes to let the flavors meld.  You may stir occasionally, but leave it alone for the most part.

Just after removing the lid

After about 30 minutes, uncover and taste-test.  Adjust seasonings to your liking and add a splash or water or stock if you like a soupier chili.  Let it simmer and cook down for at least 30 more minutes, stirring occasionally.  It will get darker red and the sweet potato will get tender. 

 

See how much darker red and chunkier it gets?

 Enjoy, and top with avocado, sour cream, creme fraiche (I'm all about those cultures!), whatever you like.  If you don't want or need to put it on top of noodles, serve it with cornbread of course.  Does that even need saying?  We like the Pioneer Woman's Skillet Cornbread, though I make a few tweaks, including using bacon grease instead of shortening.  Get a copy of Nourishing Traditions.  It'll change your mind about animal fats and health.

EDD: Egg Deposit Deadline

First egg ever

6 egg day

 23 September 2013

One of our six chickens has just begun laying.  Her first egg appeared two weeks ago today.  The first few were small, the last few have been about the size of a store bought large egg.  They are all delicious.

She's been giving us one a day, usually mid-morning, so I've gotten in the habit of expecting one in the morning.  I walk to the coop confident that I'll find another pretty, blue egg waiting in the egg box.  I sweet talk her, pet her, and tell her what a good chickie she is.  If the box is empty, I just come back later.

The past couple of days, though, I've really been almost peeved that she's not laying on a schedule.  I've been giving her an EDD, a deadline based on my convenience

About when it all started

Bitsey, the boss, mean muggin'

I've also been anxiously watching the others to see when they'll "go."  My two red stars or red sex-links were supposed to be the first ones to mature and lay eggs.  Neither is yet, despite one being the quickest to physically mature. I have been going out more and more to check the egg box as they seem closer and closer to laying.  Still, it's just been the one blue egg daily.

She isn't on my clock.  Gosh, somebody slap me.  Hi, my name is Kate.  You know, the birth activist who really thinks due dates are a complete myth?  What is the deal here.  I've gotta back off and let these feathered ladies do their thing.  They really do remind me of ladies of decades past with ruffled petticoats peeking out from under long skirts.

So anyway, due dates...estimated dates of confinement, expiration dates.  Yeah, they are all crap if you are healthy and your baby is, too.  I just read the most amazing birth story of a first time mother who gestated happily for 43 weeks and birthed a 10 pound baby boy with her patient, supportive doctor cheering her on.  Wow.  Where is he?  Can he teach seminars around the country?

Many of us, myself included, do have a last minute panic and feel like yes, I am going down in history as the first woman who was pregnant for forever.  We put so much pressure on ourselves sometimes, and so do the people around us.  It bubbles over as a meltdown most often or the kind of grumpiness that puts you in a funk.  I don't want anybody to spend those last days of pregnancy down and/or anxious.

It's just so hard for me to hear about an intelligent, informed mother going back and forth with her provider about an arbitrary date and being pressured, scared, or convinced to accept intervention when both she and baby are still thriving.  Even worse is hearing the woman who says things like, "I never could go into labor on my own."  Your dates were wrong, my dear, not your body's clock or hormones.

Yes, there are women who carry babies ten full months, over 42 weeks no matter how you add up the dates, but I honestly think that is rare.  Far more commonly do we miscalculate whether from lack of knowledge of how it actually all works, business, or just forgetting to track a month or two.  It's easy to do.  "Wait, did I ovulate last week or the one before?"  That one week makes a huge difference depending on your provider who will likely rely on a date from an early ultrasound (which you do NOT have to have).  Even fundal height can easily be off depending on who measures and how they do it.

We didn't all start menstruating on our 12th or 13th birthdays did we?  Do we all ovulate on day 14 and have 28 day cycles.  Do we all experience labor the exact same way?  Do we all have our morning (or afternoon or evening) constitution at the same time?  Do we all like to be intimate at the same time of day?  Nope.  Why on earth would we all fit into the very narrow window of acceptable dates for giving birth?  Great apes have something like a 60 day window.  Why is ours 28 days at best in most situations, since 37-40 is what's okay for women by the standards of many care providers?  Bravo for the evidence-based practitioner who understands that 41 and even 42 weeks are nothing to fear.  Sure, it's a period of watching and waiting, but not one inherently fraught with danger and fetal demises.

There are multiple ways of calculating your dates, at least 5.  Mine with Isabelle were spot on, just a few days apart.  With Will, they were all over the calendar, some falling in July, most early to mid August.  He was born August 22nd.  I was 41+4 calculating the most generous way, which I hear most midwives find to be the closest date to go by.  On "The Wheel" I would have been 45 weeks pregnant with him.  I very much was NOT 45 weeks pregnant.  He had vernix still, languno, and was quite plump.  That should give you pause and consider how many "full term" babies you've had or met who really were 36, 37, 38 weeks instead of 40, 41, or 42.  Contrary to popular belief, overdue babies do not get too big to be born vaginally.  They do the opposite.  A clinically post-term baby is shrunken since he or she has used up the mother's body's resources and is no longer thriving.  In fact, the only way to know if you were "overdue" is a thorough newborn exam and examining the placenta. 

So, as a chicken owner, I've decided to give them the same respect that I do to the human mothers around me.  Back the f&*# off.  Leave them alone.  The more I go out, the more the neighbor's dogs bark, and the longer it takes her to lay that one egg.  A watched pot, even feathered, does not boil.  If chickens didn't know when, where, and how to lay eggs, the culinary arts would be far different.  I've only had chickens since April.  People have been cultivating these charming, comical, and practically brainless birds for a looooooong time.  I bet mine will know what to do when the time comes, whenever that may be, and I bet each will do it on her own terms.

2 February 2014

That was written in a hurry a few months ago.  I literally started laughing at myself as I shut the laying box.  After Bitsey "went" (just as we birthy peeps say of "our" mamas), the other 5 followed spaced out by about a week.  There were some pheromones flying--the week before somebody else "went," the other who were already laying bullied her.  The laying ones got all exclusive.  It became a layer's only club.  Coco, the last one to "go" is still the odd man, well hen, out.  They just do not like her.

For the time being, we get 4-6 eggs a day rain, shine, or ice here lately.  All of my ridiculous frustration was forgotten until today when I realized that I've sworn to publish something daily and saw this 85% complete.  That's another bad habit of mine--jumping into a project and almost finishing, like so close it's absolutely ridiculous.  Out with the old, in with the new.

Chickens no likey ice

Sweet Coco with a pecked up comb

The two reds as days old chicks

Add caption

Hearing Truth

Today is my thirty-first birthday.  Tonight, actually, marks my unexpectedly early arrival and the beginning of me, my story that has become inextricably interwoven with the people and places around me.  Reading Under the Tuscan Sun years ago, a single sentence about the essence of being Southern sticks with me--how I define myself is deeply rooted in place.  She means location, but for me I think defining myself began with the place I took in my family beginning that night.  I am the first grandchild on both sides, the oldest cousin, an only child who was lucky to live through a premature and infection stressed start.  That place has shifted as dearly loved grandparents pass away and my own family grows.  Well, it has and hasn't--if I'd never been those things, I'd be a very different person now.

I've been thinking a lot lately about who I am.  I know where I am and how pleased I am with the current location situation, but who is harder to pin down.  The ways we think of ourselves are too often subjective, adverbs and adjectives that describe what we like, what we do, what we have.  The trap of dualities once fallen into is hard to escape-I am not one thing, so I must be the opposite.  I like nouns.  In the order that they happened, I am:

A daughter
A granddaughter
A niece
A cousin
A friend
A student
A writer
A lover
A wife
A mother
A teacher
A doula

It's a much shorter list than I expected when I first started pecking out letters.  These are things that I am independent of judgement, my own or that of others.  There are probably a few more that could be added, but I think there is more truth in a free-write sketch. 

A literal translation of one of my favorite phrases, sat nam, is, "I am truth," or literally translated, "true name."  Don't get all into the multi-layered philosophy of it.  Again, it complicates things.  There are the words, and there is the most simple definition.  If you listen just right, the lung filling, catch at the peak inhale is, "Sat," the exhale's deflating hiss, "Nam."

The above list is me--my true name, my truth, the things that make up what I consider to be me at my very core.

I don't mean truth as in perfection or the opposite of a lie, though certainly it would be a lie to say that I am not any of the nouns on that list.  They are not arguable or open for discussion.  They are truth.  Had I said, "I am a good or bad <noun>," there would be room for falsehood.  So truth as in veracity of self-definition is the idea I'm after. 

How freeing is it to think that you are your own truth?  Truth is not static though comprised of very concrete words.  It is expansive.  It begins as a tiny person free of any concept of "me," unfolds slowly as that child navigates familial roles and growing friendships, and explodes as their experiences and passions further solidify their true name.  Breathing is necessarily a process of opposites--without the in you cannot have the out.  Listen closely and remember two words.  You will hear, "I am truth."