Week Two***

8  Power Vinyasa Flow 5 was a fun flow. I got lower in forward fold and worked to stay lifted and strong in poses rather than collapse to get a hand to the floor.  Each of these classes is really different, and I never know what kind of pose series the instructor is going to take me through.  Sometimes I am looking forward to something that isn't included; sometimes they pull out poses I'm not as familiar with.  It's all good and good for me.  Part of the mental side for me is letting it be what it is--not being disappointed when it goes a different direction than I'd expected.  Just like in life, it is what it is regardless of what I thought I wanted or needed--emptying expectation to be more open to the present.

Downdog with pants photobomb

Need to get knees down and back flat

Lotus: tight but there

9 HARDcore Yoga challenged my core strength an talked a lot about finding peace--nice on this second Sunday of Advent after lighting our Peace candle.  I'd never tried this one, and she talked about how much more there is to yoga than just strength, and how the true purpose is to create peace in your mind in a challenging pose, on your mat during practice, and off of your mat as you go out into the world.  Had a hard time sticking the last couple of poses in the balancing flow on both sides.  My rector spinae are sore from that Ashtanga class Friday, and core work is extra hard with this diastisis recti still.  Shavasana is still the hardest for me--just lying still.  Sounds silly, but being still and letting thoughts pass without attachment or judgement is tough.  It's in those moments of surrender that I listen for God and set my intention to carry forth the calm and peace that I feel.

10 Afternoon meditation and evening Chakra Balancing Yoga.  What's more peaceful than being still?  I'm sore, and this still counts as yoga.  It's harder for me to sit still and work on the inside me than it is to move, sweat, and work on the outer me.  Today, the lyrics, "Let there be peace on earth and let it begin with me," kept running through my head.

Me: Calm

11 Align and Flow was horrible.  How's that for peace?  The music was louder than her voice, and her cues were not very good.  I've done a lot of yoga, and it sucked.  I almost finished, though, and tried, tried to get out of my head and into the class.  Turns out I spiked a fever and the body ache was fever not soreness from exercise.

***We got sick.  I mean everybody but Frank for the better part of two weeks.  For me, it started the afternoon of the 11th with fever.  By Thursday, I had a shiny new inhaler, steroids, cough syrup, and more meds to stop the cough.  The cough.  I should probably be a proper noun--the Cough.  It should have it's own room in our house.  It was bad, and it's just now eased up in the week since Christmas.  Then, the kids got it.  All Frank and I wanted was for everybody to be better enough to really enjoy Christmas, and we were, thankfully.  Needless to say, yoga went bust.  I'll restart today with the new year and continue through my birthday, the big 3-0.*** 

First Week of Advent

First Week:

1  Detox Yoga #3 from was challenging.  There is no way I can get into the cool arm balances (well, except for Bakasana/Crow), bind my side angle, or take those optional pushups en route to Adho Mukha Svanasana/Down Dog.  Lots of twisting and hip stretches--tight hips, back, and shoulders needed it.  I stuck with it and stayed calm even with the kids alternating between giggling and howling as they ran around me and the dog and a cat or two parking on my mat staring a few times.  Being still is hard.  I'll work on Savasana--the iPod skipped to some, er, uncensored rap song and broke my focus.  Okay, I dropped an s-bomb.  It happens.  Not very mature or reverent, but I'm being honest here.  I found a chill yoga song, though, and at least laid still for a few minutes to end.  It was good.

2  First Sunday of Advent; Hope candle lit today. Jivamukti Yoga 1.  Shaky, falling out of a couple, and skipping headstand for lack of a free wall (more lack of ab strength to hold myself up sans support).  Classic flow of standing poses to gentle inversions.  The Sanskrit chant that opened and closed this one was really perfect: "Lokah samasta sukhino bhavantu" which translates to something along the lines of, "May all beings everywhere be happy and free and may the thoughts, words and actions of my own life contribute in some way to that happiness and to that freedom for all."  If that's not pushing myself to be more Christlike, nothing else is.  I don't understand Christians who fear yoga philosophy and see it as a threat.  I am calm, content, and feeling like jello at the moment.

3  Hip Opening Flow #3.  Got up early, drank a cup of coffee and got right to it.  Mornings are tough but quiet.  I'm stiff, "all stove up" as my grandfather used to say, but my mind is quiet.  The vinyasa flows had my arms and chest protesting, but it was pretty gentle.  I had a 4 year old silly yogi watching and talking to me for a few minutes, fixed her breakfast, and came back to finish up.  My balance was pretty rotten in Eagle and Warrior 3.  Stuck a tripod headstand with my toes barely off the ground, but it was air nonetheless.  Got loose enough to give Wheel 3 good goes and feel lifted in it.  I am already noticing more calm throughout my day with less effort.  I feel more sincere and am seeing the coming of Christmas through my children's eyes--after last year's grinchiness (on my part alone), I never dreamed I'd experience that childlike awe as an adult.  Preparing for Christmas was more spend and stress, less spiritual.  The contrast is proof that there is always hope--hope for more joy, newness, an open heart.

4  Advanced Forest Yoga is not all that advanced.  Ended my day on the mat.  Frank was too sore for another Crossfit workout this am or pm, so he did it, too.  Pretty gentle, holding some poses, nice stretch with a little heat and shakiness.  I missed doing it this morning, but Isabelle came to our room in the night.  She wakes up when I get out of the bed no matter what.  I'm in the phase of life where I can either exercise well in the am OR have fixed hair, put on makeup, and wear real clothes.  Those 4 things rarely happen together.

5  Got up early, had a cup of coffee, and did Power Vinyasa Flow 1.  Felt great, but backbends and hip openers are tough in the am.  Stuck both of the Tripod Headstands and Bakasana. Nice way to start a rainy day.

6  Yoga for Strength 1.  If yoga begins when you want out of a pose, it began for me before my practice had even begun today.  It reminded me of runs in days past where the hardest part was getting out the door and pushing though the first mile or so.  I did the whole thing and was able to get deeper into downdog and forward fold than usually possible in the mornings.  Waiting until later makes it harder in my head and easier in my body.

7 Finally quelled the feelings of inadequacy and tried an Ashtanga class, Dharma Flow.  It was good to get into some basic modifications of deep opening poses like full Eka Pada Rajakapotasana/Pigeon and Bhujapidasana/Shoulder Arm Balance--nothing impressive going on in those, but maybe by the end of the month I'll be able to rock them.  I'm already feeling stronger in my arms and core.  Dedicating time to daily practice has also helped to keep my mind from racing throughout the day.  Me slowing down = kids slowing down = Frank not coming into a crazy, overtired, stressed house at the end of the day = improvement.  I wouldn't go as far as saying that I have the yoga blissed-out feeling all day, but I am certainly more content.  I've also gotten up early (even on days when I didn't get to my mat early) and read an Advent devotional, filling another empty spot in me.

7 down, 24 to go.  Namaste 

Advent: Cultivating Calm

Since early this past summer, I've been psyching myself up to do yoga daily for a month, a whole month.  It always starts at the end of one month, and I think to myself, "This is it.  I'm going to do it."  In my mind's eye, I see the it happening: The house is silent and dark.  I wake early and come to my mat to begin the day in sweaty devotion--devotion in the sense of emptying myself of judgement, restlessness in mind and body, cultivating calmness, and making room for something greater than myself.  I envision my hour or so of daily asceticism that is at the same time indulgence.  When else will I get to take this flow once I get myself wound tightly and slip into the modern mantra of "busy is productive" and striving for purpose and organization that looks (and feels) more like a frenzied mess?  I always have more to give when I begin the day with that take for myself.

Here it is December first.  I've yet to stick to my plan.  It fizzles every time.  I guess my intention isn't very set, maybe just not very strong.  As soon as a kid is sick, we're up late, or I'm just tired and lazy when the alarm goes off, I'm off track.  A day skipped ruins the whole thing. 

So, this yoga for a month thing and Advent.  It's a nice fit put together.  Finding a way to refocus the Christmas getting and giving for my kids has been on my mind.  We'll do the Advent wreath, read simple Bible verses with them, and hang an ornament for each week leading up to lighting the Christ candle.  What about me?  I need preparing, too.  What better way to open my heart for the greatest Gift than spending an hour or so getting my cluttered thoughts out of the way, slowing down to listen and ground myself, and doing so with gratitude to God for the gifts in my life and a commitment to bettering myself physically and spiritually.

First Week